CAPABLE!
We've all been there! Relationships end. Heartbreaks happen, and people change. But, what do you do with the relics of a relationship? And I mean, both the physical and the psychological. Do you destroy them? Bury them deep inside yourself perhaps? Or, do you embrace them, use them and learn from them? Let's face it, it's rare that anyone escapes life without some sort of pain or suffering. But, with pain and suffering comes an opportunity, if we so choose, to learn more about ourselves and grow. To become stronger and really see what we are capable of.
HONESTY AND CREATivity.
To explain this project is going to involve me being a little vulnerable if I'm completely honest. This is a project that I’ve been sitting on for nearly two years and that was created, in part, post-breakup. My relationship had ended. Heartbreak happened. People had changed and it was temporarily a dark time in my life, as anyone who’s been through any sort of a breakup will know. But, a lot of time has passed since then, hence why I probably feel more comfortable sharing some of it with you now.
Anyway, one of the ways I used to cope with some of the unresolved feelings was to write. And man, I wrote a lot! I’ve always found it cathartic to get my thoughts and feelings down on paper. To get them out of my head even if it’s only temporarily. It’s not about the quality of the writing but more about the thoughts being processed in some way. Most of the time it was very late at night when the insomnia was starting to take control. But, amongst the scrawling dark ramblings of my then melancholic state, occasionally there were a few lines that would stand out or perhaps trigger an idea.
Once I’d written these words down I couldn’t get them out of my head. ‘You twisted my heart sideways but showed me what I was capable of.’ It perhaps had something to do with the added fact that around the time of writing them, I’d come home to find the obligatory box of memories and returned items from my ex on the doorstep. The physical relics of the relationship! And, amongst them was a piece of artwork I’d created, based on a poem that I’d written for her. Now, I get it! I understand completely why she didn’t want to keep it but at the time, it felt like she’d ‘twisted my heart sideways’. (Remember folks I’m in a much happier place now, this was a long time ago!)
But, I go back to my earlier question; ‘What do you do with the relics of a relationship?’ The physical ones in this case. Friends suggested putting it all straight in the bin, or perhaps a ritual burning as some sort of closure from it all. Neither appealed to me at the time. But what did appeal to me was to make something new out of it. Inspired by some of the lessons I’d learned about myself and by the thing that I now knew I was capable of. Something I’d spent a long time doubting about myself. Wow, this is heavy, isn’t it? Stick with me though, as I feel like you need an explanation for this one!
THE PROJECT
I knew what I wanted to do with the piece but at the time it was going to be a simple idea. I’d change it and work directly on to the existing artwork. Then use the piece as a reminder and something positive to take away from it all. In walks, my dear friend, Paul Stringer, and that idea suddenly goes up a notch, or seven!
Paul is a filmmaker and photographer. Paul and I have collaborated on lots of commercial jobs in the past. But we both also try to get together to create just for the fun of experimenting with ideas and techniques when time allows, which isn’t that often. This is another contributing factor as to why it’s taken so long to get this project finished.
Anyway, Paul and I had been talking about doing some stop-frame photography experiments for a while. Basically, taking lots of photos in a row and stitching them together to form a piece of film or moving image. We'd searched lots of references and ideas but Paul suggested we look at, Japanese artist, Takeshi Ito and in particular a video piece called ‘Thunder’. I loved it! It's completely bonkers!
So with that as our reference, we formulated a plan to do something much more creative with the artwork than my original idea. A new project had evolved. We shot nearly 3000 images. We then sat on them for over a year due to our crazy schedules. We finally organised an edit day and it was starting to come together. I say coming together, we'd got all the images flowing as a stop frame. Then another few months passed. Then this week we arranged a final edit day as we both wanted to finish it. We ‘ummed and arghed’ about all sorts of elements of the piece at the last edit. But finally, ‘CAPABLE’ is finished and is now ready for us to share.
IMAGES FROM THE PROJECT
ART AS THERAPY!
I feel like I’ve shared a lot of myself here! (See the below quote!) But for me, the act of creative expression is a form of therapy. A way of processing some of the harder feelings we all encounter at some point or other. It’s cathartic. The work I find the most interesting is always the darker stuff. Maybe happiness just doesn’t inspire me as much. But that’s a whole other blog post…literally! (HAPPINESS IS BULLSHIT!)
Look, this project comes from the 'particulars' of a long time ago in my life. I’m in a really good place now and I don’t want that to change anytime soon. But, in the particulars lie the universals. By which I mean, we all go through similar struggles as humans. We’ve all been through tough times and will continue to do so. That's just life sometimes! But, when we come out the other side of those tough times then hopefully we’ve learned some valuable lessons, got a little bit stronger, and found out what we’re capable of as a result
I’ve ranted on a lot but just wanted to say a huge thank you to Paul for collaborating with me on this project, and for being so open to some of my more out-there ideas. If you’ve made it this far in the blog, be sure to go and check out Paul’s work and show him the same support you show me.
Another unusual project for Creative Nowhere Land. But, that’s exactly why I started all of this. I wanted a place to share these random pieces on my creative and experimental journey. The journey to try and find my voice and what I want to say through the work I create. So thanks for indulging me. It might continue to be a bit random for a while. Make sure you’re signed up for the newsletter to stay up to date with all things Creative Nowhere Land and to see what the next weird and wonderful project might be.
Until next time…